The Mason Kane Foundation Honoring children who left this world too soon
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Dear Mason...

3/4/2011

2 Comments

 
Dear sweet baby boy,
What a wonderful, busy week I have had! My new job is wonderful! It keeps me busy all day and the people are just great! I'm sure you already know this but your foundation is doing so well! We have helped so many families, the sad part for us down here is that those beautiful children aren't here with us anymore, you have so many more to play with up there.
I came home tonight feeling wonderfully tired and ready to relax and get a long nights sleep, but when I laid down sleep didn't find me. You did. My thoughts drifted to you like they do so often, and as usual I felt my throat get tight, my eyes start to burn and the pain shot through my heart as I thought of your beautiful eyes and big smile. I miss you so!!!! I tossed and turned for a while, then curled up next to Papa and he turned over in his sleep and put his strong arms around me like he somehow knew, even while he was sleeping, that I needed to feel safe for a while. But sleep still didn't come. I got up and went over to our chair, you remember? The big overstuffed white one that was in your room? All the nights that sleep wouldn't come for you and we would sit there together, sometimes for hours, and listen to the classical music that I thought should soothe you and help you sleep. Silly Nana, as soon as we put on the rap music your little head would rest on my shoulder and soon those LONG eyelashes would be laying on your cheeks. Sometimes I would just stay there and hold you for a while, listen to you breathe and marvel in the fact that you were so perfect. We usually had your big puppy dog under our arms, and he is there with me now while I sit alone in our chair, my arms empty except for that soft puppy that still smells like your sweet smell. But I can't hear you breathing or see you sleep and my heart aches even more. The tears just won't quit running tonight and I decide I should just give in nd let the sorrow wash over me for a while instead of fighting it so hard. 
Sweet, sweet baby boy, if I could I would take your place. Better yet, I would bring you back to me. I loved you then, I love you now and will love you forever my angel. Maybe now that I talked to you for a while sleep will find me and if it does I hope you visit me in a dream.
I love you a bushel and a peck my boy. Tell Nana and Grandad hello for me and do an extra sommersault tonight. Many many hugs and kisses. Sweet dreams.....


Picture
2 Comments
Jen link
3/4/2011 10:06:02 pm

xoxo

Things are moving forward for a reason, and Mason is there cheering you on!!

I am glad you have sweet memories, a fluffy stuffed dog, and that chair.

And I hope you have sweet dreams again soon. You are blessed, and are blessing so many with mason's foundation....

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candi
3/5/2011 05:00:05 am

dear love bug.. I sot here in tears as I read this blog tonight.. Just know he is always with you.. watching and smiling so proud of you he is and so am I... love you tons<3

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